Rejection, whether it’s romantic or favours isn’t easy to take. In fact, it feels the same as physical pain. Scientists put participants under MRI and asked the people to recall their recent rejection experiences. They discovered a remarkable result - the rejection activated the same areas of the brain when under physical pain.  When you’re turned down for a job, it can impact your self-esteem, self-worth and motivation. The good news - those negativities only exist in your mind and you can do things to lessen their impact on your will to succeed. A job may or might not for everyone and not all can be accepted. These are some of the common fears of job hunting. •   Embarrassment •   Failing the interview •   Fear of rejection •   Fear of not landing the job you’re looking for •   Fear of change 1. Make a plan B or a contingency plan Plan B means a second option that can serve as your second opportunity in case things go wrong. It’s likely that you can get two or more interviews when you send multiple applications using a laser technique versus a shotgun technique (sending to specific applications versus sending to unrelated applications).   You can either squeeze two interviews in one day (if they are short and within the same area) or reserve one interview in the following day unless that interview is very urgent - therefore making it a priority. Likewise, don’t put all eggs in one basket. Expand your opportunities and choices by using an effective job search because concentrating all your hopes in one vacancy could be devastating if you fail compared to a situation when you knew that you have 4 or more interviews waiting in your calendar plan. Sources of plan Bs Personal networks from friends, ex-coworkers, co-applicants, and family Trade associations ​​Government agencies Public Employment Service Office by DOLE Part-time jobs to cover your expenses while job hunting 2. Ask for feedback Thank the interviewer or hiring manager for inviting and giving an opportunity. You can stand out among the applicants because few candidates send a thank you verbally or even a thank you letter to the human resources. Sending a thank you letter means you increase your visibility among seekers. Ask the interviewer for feedback as it can give you info where you failed and what to do with it. Some companies give e-books or guides for the specific skill so that when you apply next time, you’re more ready. Others will give feedback right away along with the rejection letter. On the other hand, some won’t provide feedback. More companies are looking to the database/records of rejected applicants and try to call them after a few months or year. They could ask if you’re still interested in or looking for a job. Thank the interviewer ​​Give them a choice of providing feedback without a demanding tone such as “If you have feedback for me, I’d love to know and use it to improve and make myself a strong candidate.”​   3. Analyze what you can and can’t control Knowing the things you can and can’t control in your job quest, can help you become more objective and easily handle job rejections. Things you can control Things you can’t control Your perseverance and efforts to make networks Being turned down because of someone inside the company or organization favoured the other candidate who happens to be a relative or close friend of that employee/hiring personnel. Your reaction and how you market your transferable skills. Job hunting efforts Job market and trends Your preparation and performance and for an interview Job competition Professional behaviour in all situations Unprofessional employer and interviewer 4. Avoid myths that can hinder your job application Believing or practising these myths can reduce your chances of getting a job.  Apply to vacancies as many as possible - Blasting resumes to numerous recruiters and vacancies as many as possible could lead to multiple interviews and email replies but such 'shotgun' approach can sacrifice quality applications. You might waste your time and resources attending to job opportunities that you don't like. And they would end up in ignored folder of recruiter's email. You don’t need cover/application letter - While employers read straight to your resume, cover letters communicate your intention to apply. One resume fits for all - Not every resume are made equal.  A specific resume tailored to a specific qualification can help you get closer to your job. Follow up means nagging - Without follow-ups, you can lose chances of being hired or getting a job in the near future. There are hundreds of applicants vying for that position. Send a sweet and short thank you letter to express your interest and gratitude for the opportunity. No one can find my online activities - The sense of privacy and anonymity can make up for the sense of overconfidence in social media posting. But anything you post online can be noticed on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, LinkedIn streams. What you post could influence the hiring personnel’s decision. 5. Strengthen your confidence Confidence, according to Psychology today, is the state of being when you believe in your ability to meet challenges or the unknown during the course of action of your choosing. Build your confidence by identifying issues and taking actions. Issues Action Anxiety before a job interview Breathe and exhale to reduce anxiety. Use these breathing exercises. Prepare for the interview by researching the job and the company, researching the right answers for interview questions. Imagine that you are a known public speaker or a politician that uses hand gestures. Anxiety during an interview Use appropriate gestures while explaining or remembering. Using hand gestures can help you express your ideas, thoughts and decrease your anxiety levels. Rest your clasped hands in your lap to avoid subconscious squirming and hair twirling. Speak slowly since rapid and hurried speaking is a sign of nervousness. Pause between topic or the during course of speaking. This can help you avoid veering off the topic. Unsure about the dress code Clarify the dress code to the company or interviewer. Most or all sales, marketing and hospitality industry require a strict dress code (long sleeves, slacks, suits, ties) while some information technology companies are quite lax on their dress code. Unsure about the knowledge of the company Research the company Negative self-talk Use self-affirmations that are a list of sentences meant to be repeated and reread daily. Once you got used to saying the self-affirmations, your brain will unconsciously believe them. Here’s an awesome list of self-affirmations.  

Since our economy and way of living rely on the free market, being unemployed sucks. If you or your friend is unemployed, these things could happen: Loss of income - No stable and reliable source of income means lower or zero purchasing power, you can’t buy goods and services. Social costs - Unemployment is related to poverty and property crimes. Loss of government revenue - The government can’t collect taxes or meet a required tax revenue since people are unemployed. Depression and personal problems - Long term unemployment can lead to lower self-esteem, stress, social stigma, loss of peace of mind, depression, and reduced mental health.   As an employed individual, you can help your unemployed friend. Ask your friend if he/she needs help and then offer a helping hand. You’ll be remembered for the good things you did. Generous people are happier than selfish individuals and that’s a fact. 1. Refer to a network You could have a close friend, a sibling, a fiance, and a relative who is employed in another company with vacancies. You can also refer your friend to your company. A network can help you speed up the hiring process of your friend. You can ask him/her to make a resume to send to your network. You could also assist in writing resume/Curriculum vitae. 2. Refer to a part-time job You could have a part-time job and you can refer him/her. These part-time jobs might be online jobs (writing, SEO, graphic design, programming, data scraping). Part-time jobs are quick and can provide a quick way to earn a side income to cover monthly bills, rental, transport, mobile, and food while looking for a full-time job. 3. Use a job search site If your friend is unaware or inactive in a job search site, you can join a job search account such as Oh! Jobs.ph. It’s a job search portal where you can look for a comprehensive list of local and international job vacancies. Making an account is free and also you can help in updating employment details.   4. Give advice and job hunting guide references Finding a job is not as simple as applying for a vacancy and showing up for an interview, you need to be ready before an interviewer, dress professionally, and answer questions properly. You might have a bunch of ebooks or physical books that you can send or lend to your friend.  References: Interview guide - Theinterviewguys.com   Guides from Rappler Dress guide -  Men’s guide   Women’s guide Researching the company - Wikihow 5. Empathize and be there You can add support to your unemployed friend by providing emotional support. Empathize and be there when they need someone to speak to. You can ask your friend or relative to go with them if they ask (of course - except in interviews).You could go with him/her to attend a job fair or networking event. Who knows, you may get new network, business and career opportunities too. Also, avoid saying things that may hurt his/her feelings such as:  You got tons of free time now. I don’t know why you’re taking so long to find a job. I got mine within 2 weeks. What’s exactly you’re doing all day? Just go with any salary (even if it's mediocre ones). 6. Offer your resume writing and internet/web skills You could be skilled or know some making resumes that include writing, editing, and formatting. You can give advice on how to format resumes according to commonly used types such as chronological, functional, combination and targeted. Offer to take a look at your friend’s resume as this can be helpful in catching typos and grammar errors (having a second pair of eyes works best for editing). You might be savvy on internet and web skills that you can offer your spare time making her/her some online and web-based resume. 7. Get fun together This is the time when you and your friend spend time together to enjoy a fun time without thinking about the worries of job application results and hunting.  Use this free time to visit nature parks and play video games. In fact, parks are boon to health and mental health. Gaming rooms provide fun and problem-solving practice. Several articles described the benefits of parks and games. Dine-in a restaurant or spend time with light drinks together.

You've done it. You passed the interview. Providence has smiled down on you and a company that is even more desperate to recruit staff than you are for a job has decided to recruit you into their ranks. Now that you have the job your next big challenge will be to keep it. Probation periods are essential to both the company and the employee, as they allow both parties to decide whether they are fit for each other. This “trial” commonly endures somewhere in the range of a month to half a year  –  depending on the organization that you are in.  According to research, almost one in five new hired employees sees to fail their probationary period right after starting a job. However, there are ways to ensure that your position is secured within your new role well past the initial probationary period.  Be impressive You can only have one first impression. Do it well. Be cheerful and show enthusiasm. It is great to show positivity all over your face and body language, as it will determine your attitude towards the pressure and tasks that are given to you. At all times, it is important to remain positive and open to learning. It is smart to dress wisely, as well. This just shows that you are more than serious and you take and respect the job seriously. Also, pay attention to timekeeping. Arrive a little earlier, leave a little later than your normal obligated work hours. Stand out and make a good impression. Be quick on developing a solid reputation as someone who is reliable and can deliver positive and great results with firmness and quality of work. Be accountable Yes, you will make a mistake. You will definitely make mistakes. Accept it. As the new guy in the team, of course, there will be things that are new to you and will take time to familiarise yourself with. Don’t stress too much, your management and bosses will unlikely be mad at you when you made a mistake at the job and still is finding your footing. But you should not take this for granted and always take responsibility for any mishaps you do. Keep in mind that in this probationary period your bosses will take a very careful look at your overall performance. They will most likely notice those mistakes you will make and how you react upon those mistakes. So, be proactive and firm about being able to bounce back from those problems you have caused. Be professional Avoid being late or worse, being absent. Absence and tardiness are some of the everyday factors of why managers fail the potential candidate for the job. And these two are some of the most “no, no” red flags for employers. Of course, there will come a time that you will get sick, or may sometimes attend an important matter, or maybe even get unfortunate in commuting that will lead you to be late for work. Just be professional enough to take time and keep your bosses informed. Let them know how sorry you are and you understand that attendance does matter. For in this short period of time, every move you make will show what will you be doing for the rest of your time in that company. For them, what you do in your first months at work, will reflect on your attitude in the long run. So, always make a real effort to be on time.  Be initiative If you really want to leave a mark and be a great asset in the team, maintain a good level of communication with your colleagues. Have the initiative to approach them. Ask for advice and tips on how things work. Have the initiative to help and offer assistance. Have the initiative to seek opportunities for growth. Have the initiative to ask for feedback to have open communication with them.  Have the initiative to do new things that you think will benefit and provide positive reinforcements to your company. Don’t be afraid to ask for assistance or mentoring from them if you need it. Don’t be afraid and just take initiative. Be calm, cool and collected Be calm, cool, and collected because as much as you want to be the man for the job, trust me, they too want you to indeed be the man for the job.  And naturally, you will feel the pressure, pressure in a way that you need to watch carefully every move you make. And that one wrong move can contribute to your demise. But keep in mind that it is not just about you proving to your bosses that you are indeed the man for the job. The job needs to satisfy your desires and live up to your expectations, as well. And if let us say, it does not, you are more than free to politely leave the offer on the table. It is a two-way road. It is about you and your employer.  So, regardless of whether you are a beginner who has just gotten his job or someone who is in the brink of execution, the probation period is one way for both you and the organization to identify whether the job’s for you or not.

Somewhere, someone’s dream is coming true. Is it your dream? What is your dream life look like? Have you ever thought about it? What is a success for you?  Success can mean different things to different people. For some, success might be financial achievements, perhaps becoming a millionaire. For some, it might mean accolades. For athletes, it may mean trophies, medals or placements like championships. For some, being successful might simply mean achieving a state of wellness, health or happiness. And whatever it means to you, always remember, that all of them have the same recipe, a recipe for success. SET GOALS You probably never met a successful person without a vision, or who don’t set goals. The chances of you finding what you want without a clear target to move forward, are right around zero. For your mind is like a GPS where you typed in the destination where you want to go, and it takes you there.  The number one reason people don’t get what they want is that they don’t know what they want. Thus we must define exactly what it is that we want. I say, Identify your “WHYs”, your reason for doing what you are doing right now.  TAKE RESPONSIBILITY Your success and failures in life are your responsibilities. If something doesn’t work out, you should not blame others or a situation. Instead, you must learn the lesson and move on quickly. It is believed that your energy should solely be focused on the present only.  Don’t make excuses as to why you aren’t where you should be. Everyone suffers setbacks. everyone has the opportunity to either blame others and situations OR to focus on moving on. Regardless of what has happened, you decide what you do now. Take what you can get and move on. HAVE SELF-DISCIPLINE  Discipline is one of the most essential traits of being a successful person, which with constant practice will have positive reinforcements to your future. It is said that it is much easier to have discipline if you have clear goals and a meaningful purpose. Something that is more important than meaningless distractions. WORK ON YOURSELF Always be obsessed with self-development. There will always be more room for improvement. This doesn’t mean you are never satisfied. it’s just that we as humans, it is in our nature to want to grow and learn new things.  Be open to learn new things and develop your mind. It can come from mentors, books, blogs, etc. Pretty much learning, like learn a lot of stuff about the things you want to improve on. As to what people say, “the more you learn the more you will earn, financially, intellectually, and spiritually.” READ Make reading as your common past time. In a world where people can’t sit for 2 minutes without becoming “bored”, or picking up phones to go on social media, be the person who loves to be alone in a quiet place, who read or listen to something that will benefit their mind, and their future.  And if you’re not a reader, try to listen to audiobooks. Gain new skills, new learnings, new strengths. MANAGE YOUR TIME Time management is essential. Others usually get stressed and overwhelmed when there are too many tasks to be done. Prioritize the most rewarding task first, and leave the unimportant ones to last. Plan in advance, like for days, weeks, months ahead, and know what needs to be done to complete the job and reach the goals. TAKE RISKS Know when to take risks in order to get where you need to go. The risk for the life that you want, or stay with the one you don’t want. Play to win, don’t play to lose.  Because oftentimes people are afraid to take risks because of fear of failure, but the greater failure would be that of regret of what could’ve been.  KEEP GOING Keep on going after suffering failures and setbacks. Those things are inevitable and are a NEED. Yes, FAILURE IS A NEED. Everyone will suffer failure and setbacks, and many of them might even lose everything. Most quit but you must never quit.  Keep going, as the greatest version of you will be formed through these adversities. Knowing that your success story is being written in every moment and decisions you make. FIND A WAY Find a way to win. Whatever life throws your way, you deal with it, smash it, dodge it, whatever it is your way, you must find a way to win — whatever it takes. It is the “whatever it takes” mentality. The confidence in knowing that whatever happens, you will give it your all and leave nothing on the table. FIND A WAY TO WIN! DO WHAT YOU LOVE In a particular saying, if you’re not doing what you love, then you can’t really claim yourself as a success. Earning tons of money while doing what you hate for the rest of your life no matter how great the compensations are, is not a successful living. It is torture. If you need to suffer doing something you don’t like in order to have a life that you love, do that. But never lose sight. Your life purpose. Your happiness. Do what you love every day, and you will never work a day in your life.  

Picture this, you just got a promotion and you are so proud of yourself because you have finally gotten what you’ve been working so hard for. But your co-workers don’t seem to be so proud of you, that they may be even talking about how you have favoritism or unfair advantage. Or maybe you’ve been in a situation where you were really happy about personal achievement, but you find that people around you are belittling it. Or you’re working at a motivation to make a positive outcome or change in your life only to have your “friends” dismiss it as being unimportant.  Well, it’s nice to think that people around us, all they want is to help us succeed, but there will be times that you will encounter a phenomenon that people call “crabs in a bucket mentality.”  So, the “crab mentality” goes like: If you put one crab in a bucket, it can claw its way up and out and return to the wild. But something interesting happens if you put a bunch of crabs in the same bucket together. So, if one of them tries to climb out, the rest will pull it back into the bucket. And if the crab tries to climb out a second time, they will actually gang up on that crab and start picking it apart so that it can’t proceed.  So, this means that none of the crabs can and will ever escape the bucket because they are all working against each other. So, the phrase that best describes this is “If I can’t have it, neither can you.” Well, in real life, we are not actually physically trying to break each other down as crabs do, but we as humans, try to break each other’s spirits down when we see someone else is on their way to success. So, whether we are aware of it or not, our method of thinking, our behaviors, our decision-making processes are greatly influenced by the people we spend the most time with.  This means that if you’re always around people who make poor life decisions in the things that you’re trying to improve. You are at risk of being pulled down by them. But, if you are able to build a different type of network when that emphasizes self-improvement, then there you will be more likely to achieve the success that you are seeking. In our lives, we will encounter many types of people as we grow older. Some of them will greatly affect how we look at the world. So as to what the motivational speaker, Jim Rohn once said: “You are the average of the five people that you spend your most time with.” And by that, it is vital that in order for us to overcome the “crab mentality” we must surround ourselves with positivity and with people that want nothing but the success of everyone. That goes to show how and why it is important to surround yourself with the right people if you truly want to live a positive life and grow as a person.