Unemployment is a serious situation and must be addressed with empathy. Most unemployed people are in their situation not because they choose to laze around but because of bankruptcy, changes in the economy, and career changes. It’s admirable that you’re there for your friend, relative or someone else but there are things (negativity and sarcasm) that aren’t OK.

• You got a lot of free time

This implies that your friend is just loitering around and not doing anything. What if he/she’s actively looking for a job, revising resume and attending interviews? Unemployment isn't one big holiday when you’re waiting for blessings. It can be boring and unsettling. 
 

• Just take any offer

Advising your friend to take any job is not only insensitive but ignores his/her experience and skills background. Saying to your friend to not be selective in his/her search for a job and just take any role or salary offer means a complete lack of understanding of the person’s situation and the living wage standards. What if that offer is below the minimum wage or a peanut salary that’s inadequate to cover daily living expenses, will you take it?  Not all offers are equal even in the same position because it depends on the company size, position, geographical location and skills. This advice would only apply if you’re in an emergency such as when you’re in other countries looking for immediate jobs just to get a visa, avoid deportation or visa penalties and if the applicant has few qualifications.
 

• You’re lucky, you aren’t dealing with stress in our work

Stress depends on the type of work but it can be equally or more stressful if you’re worrying where to get money to pay water, electricity and rental bills. It’s more worrying in an unemployed situation because you have to deal with the unemployment social stigma such as being weak-willed and lazy.
 

• Maybe you’re not doing well because it takes you so long to find a job

Everyone experienced unique circumstances in job hunting. Different situations involve applying in different company types, facing job competition, coping with costs of job hunting, and using current skills. Saying such in a diatribe form can demean a person. The main reason that can prolong a job search is when a person deliberately prolongs job hunting because of laziness and unwillingness. Factors that prolong job hunting include the following: 

– Supply and demand for the skills needed for the specific job
– The geographical location of the company and the job seeker
– Mismatched skills and experiences to the requirements of the position
– Readiness - polished resume, company research, and grooming
 

• My friend is in this situation and he/she did this … maybe you should try this

While it can be a good advice, your friend’s situation is likely different from his/hers. Saying this to a friend may backfire as it may discourage your unemployed friend. Your more successful friend’s situation is different because of the location, educational level, skills set and network.
 

• How long have you been job searching?

This question may imply a sarcastic meaning depending on the context and situation. If your friend is new in the job search, this question needs a simple answer. But if it’s sarcastic then it can mean judging the person’s ability to find a job.
 

The Bottomline

A situation that warrants blaming an unemployed person is if he or she doesn’t help themselves or willingly refuse to find a job despite having the capacity, resources and skill to find a job. Helping your unemployed friend or someone looking for a job needs lending a serious helping hand with a touch of empathy. Understand that unemployment is temporary and life is like a wheel. Sooner or later, it always comes around to where you started again (a quote by Stephen King).